Embracing Radical Self-Love with Sonya Renee Taylor, NYT Bestselling Author

Sonya Renee Taylor is a New York Times Bestselling Author and the founder of The Body is Not An Apology. She has a passion for helping others learn to develop a radical love for themselves, unapologetically. It is her belief that when we all develop this sense of radical self-love, we unlock the doors for greater liberation. In this episode of the Love Intently Podcast, Sonya is here to teach you about radical self-love and so much more.

Despite how much we hear people hype up self-confidence in our society, whether that’s on social media, TV, movies, etc., Sonya believes that self-confidence alone is just not enough. What we truly need in society is radical self-love, because as she says, “[Radical self-love] is the difference between an endeavor that is individualistic and one that is collective.” According to Sonya, when we choose to love ourselves in such a radical way, we are not only benefiting ourselves but those around us and society as a whole.

Sonya is also a firm believer that we need to throw out the idea of there being a “good body” or a “bad body”. She believes that these harsh ideals have been forced on humans as a means of putting more money in higher-up people’s pockets and as a means of oppression to hold others down. She states, “As long as we’re tied into these systems that say there are good bodies and bad bodies, we’ll always be inside this mix of oppression.”

In Sonya’s radical self-love framework, she breaks down the “Three Peaces” which include “peace with not understanding, peace with difference, and peace with your own body.” These “peaces” are at the core of radical self-love and are absolutely necessary to developing a genuine foundation for radical self-love.

Above all, Sonya believes that we deserve more than to just accept our bodies. We have to treat our bodies with the love and respect that they deserve, regardless of if they fit society's view of a “good body” or a “bad body”. She has a high aim for this in her own life as well. In the podcast she mentions, “If I have to be in my body for the rest of my existence, I want that to be a loving relationship”.

Although she is extremely passionate about these subjects and has written multiple books on them, one thing Sonya wants to be very clear about to the audience is that she is still very much so working on this journey herself. It can be easy to view someone like her who is very comfortable with speaking out about these topics and view them as though they have it “all figured out”, however, she makes it clear that this is a journey she is still on herself. So take heart in that by knowing you're not alone in the journey! Sonya is here to speak with you, not at you.

In Sonya’s episode of the Love Intently Podcast, we chat about her personal story of seeking radical self-love, defining what it really looks like, breaking down the “Three Peaces”, some key points from her book (linked below), and so much more. Tune in to hear her full story and see below for key topics discussed during this episode with Sonya Renee Taylor.

In This Episode We Discussed:

- Defining radical self-love (“Radical self-love to me is our inherent sense of worthiness.”)

- Why radical is there (“I’m interested in a love that changes systems.”)

- The difference between self-confidence and radical self-love (“Then what you’re talking about is a difference between an endeavor that is individualistic and one that is collective.”)

- Throwing out the idea of there being a “good body” or a “bad body” (“Through the radical self-love framework, we throw out the idea of there being a good body or a bad body.”)

- Breaking down the “Three Peaces” of radical self-love (“They are peace with not understanding, peace with difference, and peace with your own body.”)

- How Sonya began to embrace radical self-love in her own life (“Radical self-love doesn’t mean I never have a judgment again about my body...the difference is I separate that judgment from my inherent self)

- The difference between external life value and radical self-love, and why money can’t buy you self-love (“As soon as the money and wealth is gone, there is an entire identity crisis...because there isn’t a sense of radical self-love, there’s a sense of external life value.”)

- The importance of recognizing toxic content and how to avoid it (“It’s about really beginning to look at what is the toxic content that I’m taking in and how do I stop doing that.”)

- Breaking down “Mind Matters” (“How do I shift the way I think about things so they don’t show up in our system.”)

- Dissecting what it means to take unapologetic action (“How am I going to take different actions every single day?”)

- Identifying and defining collective compassion (“Collective compassion is ‘How do I see myself as a part of an ecosystem of human beings, and not just me?’.”)

- Loving your body vs just accepting it (“If I have to be in my body for the rest of my existence, I want that to be a loving relationship.”)

- Discussing what Sonya is currently working on

Sonya’s 3 Truths about life & love: “(1) If I don't choose me first everything will crumble, (2) humans have the ability to transform, (3) and love is the foundational ability of that transformation.”

Sonya’s Best Relationship Advice: “It can be with me or without me, but it can never be at the expense of me.”
What does Love Intently mean to Kristina: ““When I love intently, I am loving with the intention to transform all the things that are not like it.”